tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-47425299568836929872024-02-07T17:04:18.316+00:00The Lesbian ConfessionalI'm queer, I'm here, I'm sharing details from my lesbian lifeAnonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.comBlogger54125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-67025535933203542122008-06-28T10:54:00.006+01:002008-11-13T18:40:31.278+00:00Hit Paus, then Play<p align="justify">Well then, it's been a few months... So what happened? I think I just started having too much sex and got overwhelmed by it all. I simply didn't know how to start the blogpost about my conference adventure at the end of April... in a <em>convent</em> of all places. (Pictured below: <em>A</em> convent, though not the one where I was clearly possessed by the ghosts of sexually frustrated, lesbian nuns and seduced by a fellow conference attendee.)</p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5216876573425220194" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_NqEl2Xup5KhVabqr2__AOBE_MJcEDe79Hsc2R2GgJS14aLw2b7W5eqAlLtmhhmJIAGwHffl7Aq_uMRP41dUV9mnhXZm9ACuYOdpvjPAeGvfmr9VVAJoG5dN51auq7f_LVcMANQr6OoCm/s320/Convent.jpg" border="0" /> </p><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">This blog has mainly been about my not having any sex and writing down my celibate ponderings, so after an Easter sex date, a first successful lesbian one-night stand, and then yet another one-night stand while away on a conference for work (that's three women within the scope of a month, who am I, Shane? Yeah, no, really not.) I was overwhelmed by the turn my life, and thus my blog, had taken. And also, I was a bit concerned that I might have used up all of my alotted sex and that I would now be facing a dry spell that would last for years and years to come. Though, that would normalize thing in the blogosphere for me. </p><blockquote></blockquote>See what months without blogging will do? It will leave you typing like a babbling idiot. <blockquote></blockquote>So, a quick recap of the sex life of the Anonymous Lesbian: <blockquote></blockquote><ul><li>April = Lots of sex</li><li>May = Contently sans sex</li><li>June = Another weekend sex date with Miss Sex </li></ul><p align="justify">And speaking of Miss Sex, I found the perfect description of our relationship when reading Gloria Bigelow's blog on <a href="http://www.ourchart.com/">OurChart</a> (you know, that website that was grossly over-advertised on a little lesbian show called "The L Word"). Miss Sex is my <a href="http://www.ourchart.com/content/outta-town-ass">OTA</a>, my Outta Town Ass. Gloria's description is spot on: <em>"an OTA is essentially a three-day holiday — a mini relationship one visit at a time. You get all of the perks of a relationship — the romance, the sex, the cuddling and such — but with very little of the relationship trappings — the negotiation, the compromising or the 'let’s just turn in, I’m tired', or the constant needing to shave your legs." </em>Well, spot on except for that last part of shaving your legs, I ain't shaving my legs for nobody's sake except my own if that mood should strike me! </p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">This last weekend with Miss Sex involved musicals (watching the genious that is "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and Doris Day in "Calamity Jane"), cotton candy, traumatizing my dog with loud and slightly rough sex, making it up to her with long walks, and me taking care of poor Miss Sex who happened to have the flu the whole time she was here... That didn't stop her from making the most of the visit though.</p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-80366261567102691772008-04-17T20:11:00.006+01:002008-04-18T11:51:06.789+01:00Five Signs of a Successful One-Night Stand<p align="justify">In celebration of my first successful one-night stand with a woman (yes, I will admit to have had one or two with guys, back when I was still doing that male thing) I thought I'd try to compile a list of criteria for what makes a one-night stand successful. This is the result: </p><ol><li><div align="justify"><strong>It's someone you don't know. </strong>Sure, this might be a debatable point, but if I were to go home with a friend I've known for a while and have sex with her... I'm not sure what I would define it as, but it wouldn't quite be a one-night stand. In this case it was a complete stranger I met at the girl club (of course we were quickly able to establish which friends we had in common - our world is, after all, so very small), made out with one the dance floor and promptly brought home. <blockquote></blockquote></div></li><li><div align="justify"><strong>There is actual sex involved. </strong>This would seem quite obvious, if it weren't for encounters such as the one I had with <a href="http://lesbianconfessional.blogspot.com/search/label/Sleep%20Over%20Girl">Sleep Over Girl</a> back in May of last year (the words "I'm not going to have sex with you tonight" still ring in my head from time to time). This encounter was hassle free. Sure, there was that moment of walking home together, talking about this and that. And then going into my apartment, and then into the bedroom, making small talk while both wonder "Okay, so how are we gonna do this then?". But once we got the kissing going there was no stopping us. <blockquote></blockquote></div></li><li><div align="justify"><strong>There is no crying or speaking of old relationships. </strong>Staying on the topic of Sleep Over Girl for a while... She (and <a href="http://lesbianconfessional.blogspot.com/2007/06/long-date-no-kiss.html">Ex-Gaybor</a>) had me worried that my <a href="http://lesbianconfessional.blogspot.com/2007/07/i-just-want-to-go-out-and-get-laid.html">bed was cursed</a> for quite a while there, what with all the processing that was going on in it. Thankfully that curse seems to have been lifted. <blockquote></blockquote></div></li><li><div align="justify"><strong>There is no discussion of "where this is going".</strong> Now that is really fucking scary when you bring someone home with you expecting some sex with no strings attached and they start talking about how soon they can see you again or hinting towards that they're looking for more than just sex. That's where you have a me-shaped hole in the wall from where I ran out of the room screaming. <blockquote></blockquote></div></li><li><div align="justify"><strong>You don't call each other afterward. </strong>We did actually exchange phone numbers, me and this girl, let's call her Miss One-Night. But we did it in an extremely casual "maybe-we'll-bump-into-each-other-some-day" kind of way with no promise or even mention of us calling one another. It's been two weeks since our encounter and I'm thrilled that I haven't heard from her! When you do call each other... Well, that's something that might have started as a one-night stand but will quickly develop into something else.</div></li></ol><p align="justify">So there you have it. A successful one-night stand, as defined by an Anonymous Lesbian. And here's to hoping there's many more in the future! Yes, I'm aiming for total slut status.</p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-55544408844593299342008-03-24T18:53:00.008+00:002008-11-13T18:40:31.682+00:00A Psychich Appointment and Easter Sex<div align="justify">I went to see a psychic last week. I had made the appointment six months in advance and waited impatiently for the day to arrive. Of course it ended up not quite living up to my expecations but it was a fun experience and I did get some interesting tidbits out of it. I'm a skeptic at heart though and I did see a lot of signs that she was doing a traditional "cold reading", or so it appeared to me. But then again she was so right on the spot about some things, things that were very specific and that she couldn't have guessed.
<blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5181386422398645858" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHn4xmlOXvW84zc5uLTX_zVUusb3WAd7ORMYf3Ui5_uiLcRCjbimEjtzbaFnXmz2DAhHbDHODNtNUJm8nk0o1-NTqrSXUqxe3tep6j4cxe5VywvSDSvJFyHUFKRChuLn1WJvN7uylTCYs9/s320/psychic1.jpg" border="0" />
<blockquote></blockquote>One thing that definitely doesn't work in her favor is that she didn't have gaydar. Yes, most people assume that I'm straight, but a damn psychich if anyone should be able to spot that I'm as queer as they come. She was way off, talking about "he's" and "boyfriends" and a man and children in the future. She did backtrack quickly though when I corrected her use of pronoun in reference to an ex of mine, telling me that when she says that she sees "a man and children" in my future she's seeing a family picture, but that it's not necessarily gender specific. Whatever.
<blockquote></blockquote>In other news: I just got home from a visit with Miss Sex (whom the psychic did mention by name and the city she lives in) and the Easter sex was fabulous. As far as details go... Well, I did get to enjoy the wonders of strap-on sex for the first time (good times!). Miss Sex also introduced me to the beauty that is Flight of the Conchords and we watched some season 5 episodes of The L Word and were inspired by the sex scenes in more ways than one. But back to Flight of the Conchords: <blockquote><p align="center"><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/pY8jaGs7xJ0&rel=0&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/pY8jaGs7xJ0&rel=0&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object></p></blockquote>Oh, so many quotables. In that song and in others. But my new favorite line has got to be: <em>"She's so hot she's making me sexist. Bitch."</em></div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-27551868430021486772008-03-17T16:48:00.003+00:002008-03-17T17:39:02.670+00:00Falling in Love x 3<div align="justify">I went to see Tegan and Sara this past week and they were amazing, as always. Just like <a href="http://lesbianconfessional.blogspot.com/2007/08/if-i-gave-you-my-number.html">last time</a> the place was overflowing with baby dykes. Once again Sara told us that we were a very attractive city and Tegan agreed. And once again I took it as a personal compliment and the self esteem boost lasted for days and days. Here's proof: <blockquote></blockquote><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lxUp_sIBI-Y&rel=0&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lxUp_sIBI-Y&rel=0&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object><blockquote></blockquote>Though I really needed that to comfort me since Tegan didn't happen to see me in the crowd, propose marriage to me on the spot and then dedicate "Nineteen" to me. <blockquote></blockquote><object height="355" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/tqJbHM-KGWU&rel=0&hl=en"><param name="wmode" value="transparent"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/tqJbHM-KGWU&rel=0&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object><blockquote></blockquote>Of course to me she would have been singing "hi" instead of "bye". Then I would have left my stressful job that's giving me grief lately and gone on tour with them and we'd live happily ever after. Oh well, sometimes things don't happen the way you plan. <blockquote></blockquote>Regardless, I pretty much fell in love three times that wonderful night. Once with Tegan, once with Sara, and then also with Hesta Prynn from <a href="http://www.myspace.com/northernstate">Northern State</a>, the opening band for the evening. Oooh girl, that woman is smokin'! The whole group was pretty awesome, and very friendly hanging out by the merch table after the show.</div><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-8976969638378491362008-03-10T20:00:00.006+00:002008-03-10T20:33:58.884+00:00Unsafe We Are<div align="justify">It's been a while since I last wrote. It's not that I don't have anything to blog about. There's been cute girls in the dog park, my work world and world of friends colliding, a play about Frida Kahlo, the celebration of International Women's Day... Not to mention <a href="http://www.afterellen.com/blwe/03-07-08">Buffy having sex with a girl</a>! It's just that at the moment a lot of stuff is going on in my life work wise and it's draining all the life out of me.
<blockquote></blockquote>However, I did want to stop by and post something. It relates in a way to my celebration of March 8th (that's International Women's Day, for those who don't know) during which I participated in a <a href="http://www.takebackthenight.org/">Take Back the Night</a> demo. Lots of women marching together and loudly reclaiming the night, it was a beautiful thing. Of course, Take Back the Night is about protesting violence and crime against women. This following PSA is about protesting violence and crime against LGBT-people.
<blockquote></blockquote><div style="background-color:#000000; padding:5px; width:540px"><embed src="http://www.logoonline.com/player/embed/afterellen" width="540" height="405" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" FlashVars="CONFIG_URL=http://www.logoonline.com/player/embed/afterellen/configuration.jhtml%3fvid%3D214880%26autoPlay=false&allowFullScreen=true&hasContinuousPlay=false" allowFullScreen="true" AllowScriptAccess="never" base="."></embed><br/> <a href="http://www.afterellen.com" style="text-decoration:none; color:#FFFFFF; font-size:10px; font-family:Arial"><strong> Lesbian video from AfterEllen.com </strong></a></div>
<blockquote></blockquote>
<blockquote></blockquote>All in all the same message. Don't hate. Not because of gender or gender identity/expression. Not because of sexual orientation. Just don't hate.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-21981837369833348062008-02-25T21:09:00.004+00:002008-02-25T21:42:31.877+00:00Aaaah, The Heteros Are Taking Over!!!<div align="justify">I went out this weekend. For once, I got my shit together and I went out. Despite being tired and wanting to go to bed at about 9:30 pm I stayed the course. Sadly about half of the people at the birthday party I was attending did not follow through with our full night of dancing and drinking, but a small group of us managed to find the strengt to continue on. And I must say, I was pretty damn proud of myself when I sauntered home at 4 am, hearing the birds' chirping away in the early morning. However, I was also exhausted and slightly depressed. Why the sad face? Well, mainly because I was really really really hoping for something fun in the way of flirting/make-out session/one-night stand-wise to happen... and it didn't, at all. </div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">But let's ignore my faulty flirting skills and how apparently unattractive I must be since no one hits on me and get to the part where I get to displace all the blame: I blame the heterosexuals. Not necessarily all of them. But definitely the ones that were at the club I attended Saturday night. Everywhere we turned, there they were. Hetero couples practically swallowing each other's tongues and grinding up against the walls. Cute girls that would peak my interest for a second before I noticed that they were nervously holding on tight to their boyfriend's hand (I swear, some of these couples will not let go of each other's hands ALL night. I mean, if you're straight and at a gay club: At least don't be so nervous that you can't give up showing off your heterosexual identity through your linking to your partner!). Blah.</div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">Here's what I'm thinking:</div><blockquote></blockquote><ol><li><div align="justify">In my city there are tons and tons of hetero clubs. There is exactly ONE weekly gay club. So goddamn it, leave my gay club alone straight people! Let it be gay and stop watering down the queerness of it. <blockquote></blockquote></div></li><li><p align="justify">With all those fag hags and other random hetero girls running around, a femmier type chick like myself has serious trouble getting recognized as gay. And duh, that's sort of the whole point of going to gay clubs: To be able to be seen for what you are and not viewed through that same old heterosexist lense that everyone in the straight world sees you through. </p></li><li><p align="justify">Honestly, when it's not just a few straight allies (as in genuine friends of gay people) coming along to the clubs (it's not like I'm pro a super segregated gay world/straight world) it get's to be a sort of circus-y, "come-look-at-the-freaks" kind of scene. I get the whole sense of "whoo, we're so tolerant and free-spirited, partying with the gays!", it bores me to tears.</p></li></ol><p align="justify">Oh well, what the hell do I know. Maybe I'm just bitter beacuse the only attention I got was from a wrinkly woman who was leaving the club with her husband (yes, even old straight people were there) and stopped to tell me I was a beautiful girl as I was outside the club, having a smoke and telling The Ex off for passing up an awesome flirting opportunity.</p><blockquote></blockquote>Speaking of passing up opportunities! Good Guy is rumoured to have left the single club. It's just The Ex and me now, bitter as ever and both convinced that the other will leave us any day now. <blockquote></blockquote>(I truly do appologize about the bitterness of this entry. Sometimes straight people just piss me off. And couples. And happy people. Goddess, I hope I'm pms:ing so I have an excuse for this mood.)Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-29429781673007942812008-02-19T19:52:00.007+00:002008-11-13T18:40:31.951+00:00The Education of Straight People: Part I<div align="justify">The other day The Ex stopped by my office to pick something up. For some of my co-workers this was the first time they met her and one male co-worker in particular (let's call him Mr. Tall) greeted her with a curious gaze and a "So you're the famous Ex". Another co-worker referred to her as my wife and I laughed and said "Yup, that's my wife".
</div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">After The Ex left Mr. Tall got this confused look on his face and asked about this whole wife thing. I misunderstood what he was aiming at and told him that "No, we're not actually married or anything, it's just an ongoing joke we've got about being like a married couple". He shook his head and said "No, no, I know you're not really married. But... is that terminology that gay people use? Wife?" My other co-worker intercepted with a "Duh, Mr. Tall, obviously! Gay people who are married use the same terminology as straight people." Mr. Tall responded: "Okay... But if she's your wife, than what are you to her?". <blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5168790560162391650" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-7nMVlCQlYd4aH45r2SCGfSfgC7kR2T5FcVqRx37UJHIU79urhsSq7rkTUJo4q16CWs-fzZHUBaW7AY62yrVXaFqAj39KxwHYF8tvXCCCuV66_eOuU83i0THGEzWLbdU4ZCoLS8ox-p0e/s320/say_what.jpg" border="0" /> <blockquote></blockquote>At which point my other co-worker and I looked at each other and just burst out laughing, since it finally hit us what he was angling at. It took us quite a while to gather ourselves enough to reply that obviously I am The Ex's wife as well, not her husband or anything else. And then we made fun of him for the rest of the day for being LGBT-illiterate. <blockquote></blockquote>Mr. Tall definitely owns up to being completely lost when it comes to gay stuff and is one of the people I have around me that I've had many many conversations with about these things. He's always respectful in this curiousity and tells me he's just never really had gay friends or acquaintances before that he could ask about these things. And I'm happy to participate in his LGBT-education, though I am careful to explain that I can only really speak from my own experiences and that I do not in any way speak for all gay people. <blockquote></blockquote>But I don't always feel like educating heteros on the lives of lesbians... Regardless, I figured I'd return from time to time with stories on silly, funny, ignorant, and down-right insulting Q & A:s I've had with straight people.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-51032586962590460382008-02-16T19:51:00.004+00:002008-11-13T18:40:32.131+00:00Singles Can Celebrate Valentine's Day Too!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR_c_SipS5-spgVkiaOL3rEjh_ANlF4qb-OPsgNuVWD-7hN7QNk9C544VmtnkN2zhrtisFNuXNbjqlVsivtXGMJ48oiMsT6QsXw-4-BLuINrgyoU1tYDIA3SEeLAgGScYH4cHFn9U5V7vy/s1600-h/valentine.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167668508546246210" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR_c_SipS5-spgVkiaOL3rEjh_ANlF4qb-OPsgNuVWD-7hN7QNk9C544VmtnkN2zhrtisFNuXNbjqlVsivtXGMJ48oiMsT6QsXw-4-BLuINrgyoU1tYDIA3SEeLAgGScYH4cHFn9U5V7vy/s320/valentine.jpg" border="0" /></a>
<div align="justify">That's what we did. We spent Valentine's Day alone together. And we didn't feel lonely at all. <blockquote></blockquote>The Ex, Good Guy and I (aka the few remaining singles in our group of friends) decided to celebrate that traditional, romantic, commercialized holiday in our own way. We cooked a fancy three course dinner and enjoyed it with delicious wine in candle light. It was romantic as anything! It was lovely not to be the pitied singles, but to instead be envied by our coupled friends for just one night. Yeah, that's right, the couples were envying the singles on Valentine's Day, how great is that?
</div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJsD5toTb3sEScfq8k3GQEpWzr2yLEx7QOtMWP8DWTEc2kP9h81lcYsxsuFV_TLyVdA6rRWU2rVDVORH0kvT9Jq6fAOiQVCy6-wJSR9lazx-Oe0icgZKNgvSvIg5eStk4vjVuJa1X2CqQ5/s1600-h/valentine+food.JPG"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5167668525726115410" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJsD5toTb3sEScfq8k3GQEpWzr2yLEx7QOtMWP8DWTEc2kP9h81lcYsxsuFV_TLyVdA6rRWU2rVDVORH0kvT9Jq6fAOiQVCy6-wJSR9lazx-Oe0icgZKNgvSvIg5eStk4vjVuJa1X2CqQ5/s320/valentine+food.JPG" border="0" /> <p align="justify"></a>
</p><div align="justify">Our appetizer, as seen above, was heart shaped and purdy. And it tasted lovely as well! All vegan, of course. <blockquote></blockquote>So what do three vegan singles discuss over Valentine's dinner? Well, various things, but a lot of time was spent geeking out over Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Good Guy just finished watching all seven seasons and now he's going through withdrawal... Oh, that horrible feeling of realizing you've seen every episode of Buffy that's ever been or will be made. Thank goodness for the season 8 comic. So of course, we watched some favorite episodes over desert. The Ex pined over Angel and Spike (she's bi), Good Guy drooled over Spike (he's totally straight, but I think he might make an exception for James Marster), and I drooled over all the fabulously hot women to make up for all the attention the men were getting. And I cried as we watched the final episode, "Chosen", as I always do. <blockquote></blockquote>I'll stop geeking out now. I'll just let it be known that this was by far the best Valentine's Day ever. It was sweet and wonderful and I recommend more people to have romantic dates with their friends, it's good for the soul.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-54249630394028002892008-02-10T14:31:00.001+00:002008-11-13T18:40:32.548+00:00One-Sided Flirting Goes Both WaysI ventured out into the social world this past weekend as well. Not this weekend, because I've been laying at home sick with the flu, but the weekend before this one. And how did it go?
<div align="justify"><blockquote></blockquote>Well, the evening started with a trip to the neighboring city to attend a party where I knew no one except an old high school friend who was visiting Europe from overseas, and whom I haven't seen since graduation. It was great seeing him again and I met his girlfriend and caught up on all the important events of the last five or so years. Funny too, coming out for the second time to him since I identified as bisexual in high school and now identify as lesbian. So we compared and contrasted stories from high school and talked about all the drama I stirred up when I started dating my first girlfriend back in junior year. And as the wine poured we all got into more philosophical questions of the pros and cons of sex without emotional ties and the differences between women and men (biological or social constructions?). I think we all know where on the scale I fell in those debates...
<blockquote></blockquote>One very interesting facet of the birthday party we attended was how fascinating it is to party with people who you'd normally never hang out with. I don't want to come off as a snob or anything, it's just that I tend to hang around the same type of people a lot. I guess most people have a comfort zone of sorts, as far as what "their group of people" is. For me, that group consists mainly of queer vegans (or at least vegetarians) with socialist leanings. So when I find myself at a party full of more capitalist friendly, meat-eating heteros (and yes, I know that I am very very much generalizing here) it's like a whole new world to me.
<blockquote></blockquote>I had a great time mingling and there were definitely lots of pretty women there. I of course chatted fliratiously with several of them and that's when it hit me: <em>I could be as obviously flirtatious as ever and they wouldn't perceive it as flirtation.</em> And why? Well, because they're straight and don't think of women in that way, probably. If it had come up in conversation that I was gay, then maybe they'd have been watching more for those signals, but since it didn't in most convoes... well, it slipped right past them. <blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5165374274455676466" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifQBG18JnxWKsnM2QYTZEFoRmrf8F22mye9k6jqp6r8SIO1dOX44Pcj_ShFfsV_wRB5TR65W-c9Mt1kjUiF4rBJHV1RqN5bHMGk4lCdAcEEAeJ8okrCcbYwfSxl6fi54mqJJxrOB_2zFRo/s320/flirting.jpg" border="0" />
<blockquote></blockquote>And I don't find that strange at all actually, because just a few days previously I was out an errand with a co-worker. We had our first meeting with a potential collaborative partner and he happened to be a relatively young guy. Well, it was a good meeting and walking out of there to the car my co-worker pointed out that he was flirting with me pretty hard core. To which I responded <em>"Huh???"</em> I was completely clueless to all the obvious flirting that had apparently taken place in that office and I think the reason why is that I simply don't think about men that way. Thus, I don't think about men thinking about me like that. If that makes any sense.
<blockquote></blockquote>Regardless, flirting with straight girls was the only flirting I got that evening. I left the party early to head out to the women's bar in my city... but a train was cancelled and I ended up sitting at the station for an hour. And right around that time the three glasses of wine I'd had on an empty stomach all hit me at once and I didn't feel so good. So I did manage to get to the women's bar, but I ended up leaving after just making an appearance and saying hi to my friends. I'll make a new attempt soon, I promise.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-82521104394914715442008-01-27T19:53:00.001+00:002008-11-13T18:40:32.720+00:00One Night of Drinking, Two Days of Hung-Over<div align="justify">It is so unfair what the years are doing to me. It used to be I could go out and party all night and drink like a rock star, get a good nights sleep, and wake up slightly tired but all right. Now I have a night with friends, moderate drinking, and turn in pretty early only to wake up at 6:45 am, with a mouth drier than the Sahara and a pounding headache. I did manage to fall back asleep, after taking an aspirin and drinking two big glasses of water and I did manage to get up at 9:15 for an appointment I didn't want to miss... but then the rest of the day was just wasted. Whatever I tried to do it just ended up with me falling asleep. I fell asleep in the bathtub (twice), I fell asleep on the coutch watching a movie (at 7 pm) and then again while watching tv (at 9 pm). I got absolutely nothing done, so all of Saturday was pretty much a goner. Today, Sunday, hasn't been much better because I'm still not feeling 100% recovered, something that's typical for me as far as hangovers go. <blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160253489926265218" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 310px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 347px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" height="321" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnA5XMg-Ny1ZhWt_i2dGH-lj_maMmObUU3fqnYv6Mjeon9ZljNfkl_KrMVqSgFiJOxpQ9QDlTG99vfXoR6jSl1eirHnRQzPY2lsd9fFWbpngrMy1bYe9sbNJR3Drl0BeIToRo2ZUO68v28/s320/hangover.gif" width="290" border="0" />
<blockquote></blockquote>Regardless, Friday evening was nice. I should probably just realize that I can't handle quite as many glasses of wines nowadays that I seldom drink, compared to back when I was still a student. But there was lots of wine. And then some beer. And lots and lots of toasts to Heath Ledger.
<blockquote></blockquote>I was invited over for homemade vegan sushi by The Ex and her roomies (delicious!). Sitting around the dinner table in a group of queer women (well, six queer women and one straight dude who pretty much qualifies as an honorary lesbian) we started talking about places we could go out to. Sadly there were no queer bars or club nights to attend, so I had the brilliant idea of going to a hetero place, raising the rainbow flag and declaring it gay. We didn't go quite so far, but we did go out and we brought along my large rainbow flag and draped it over our table (it's terribly soiled now by various drinks). Then we sat around talking and laughing and once in a while giving the dance floor a whirl. I was of course secretly hoping some beautiful woman would happen to notice our gay table and come right over and sweep me off my feet... But that did not happen this Friday, unfortunately. Although there was plenty of LP lounging about. Next night out will be at a gayer venue, so we'll see how that goes. I'm hoping for a much lesser hangover, that's for sure.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-91581528415384222752008-01-22T20:19:00.000+00:002008-01-22T20:41:24.239+00:00Concerned Co-Workers and Easter Sex<div align="justify">My co-workers are deeply concerned about me. The reason for all this concern? The fact that I spend my Friday evenings watching old episodes of The Office and crocheting. I agree that it is slightly alarming. I mean, I am in my early 20's, an age that is typically more associated with wild nights out and sleep deprivation. So I find it sweet that two of my co-workers were trying to encourage me to go out and date, or at least find myself a one-night stand or two. <blockquote></blockquote>I, of course, informed them of my recently booked four day trip to go see Miss Sex. That is, however, way off in the future, or more specifically Easter weekend (oh, March, you can't come soon enough). I'm very much looking forward to it and I've gone ahead and purchased a few toys to bring along, all to fulfill some of the scenarios Miss Sex and I are itching to put into practice. Well, I didn't tell the co-workers about the toys actually, thought that might be a bit much. But I did tell them that I have some sex planned in already, so my dry spell this time around won't be quite so prolonged. </div><div align="justify"><blockquote></blockquote>Miss Sex does live quite a long train ride away though, and so my one co-worker suggested I get myself a more local booty call. That sounds good and all, but honestly Miss Sex is the only queer woman I've met so far who's had such an awesomely free outlook on sex with no strings attached. I've met women who come off as being very free-spirited, but once you get down to it... lots and lots of strings get attached. And then there's others that truly share my outlook on sex, but most of those are my dear friends whom I have no physical attraction towards. But hey, I'm always on the look-out. And anyway, it's not like I wouldn't consider a relationship, should an oppurtunity arise. I just think the chances are slim of me finding someone I can connect with on all the necessary levels and who actually fits into my life of very busy and huge need for alone time. But maybe some day... One things for sure: I've got a drunken night in the near future all planned out and I won't be holding back. And that's a promise.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-27283497477993494412008-01-13T12:31:00.001+00:002008-11-13T18:40:33.819+00:00On Being Social, But Still Lazy<div align="justify">I attempted to leave the comfort of my home this weekend, which was probably something that was very good for me. I've spent too many weekend nights sitting at home, watching tv and crocheting. It must stop! <blockquote></blockquote>The Ex lured me out Friday night by calling me up and pleading for me to come out with her and her class mates. She claimed they were starting to think that I didn't exist and she very sweetly referred to me as her "trofé ex", as in "check it out, I dated <em>her</em>". How could I say no to being paraded in front of her friends? So I changed my top (that's all the effort I was willing to make)and headed out to meet her at the release party they were at. <blockquote></blockquote>And a good party it was! Good music, lots of queerness (both in performances and in party goers). Lots and lots of eye candy. I made total eye contact with a very cute girl at the bar (long red dreads, so pretty), but that's were the lazy comes in. I was trying to push The Ex into making a move on one of the girls she was basically drooling over, but we quickly realized we're in the same space: Tired. We rarely go out, we're exhausted by school/work, and once we are out... Well, just being out and about amongst people demands all the energy we can muster up and thus there is no energy left for striking up a conversation with cute strangers. Or maybe it's all a tragic excuse because we're scaredy cats. I'm working on it though. <blockquote></blockquote>Until then: </div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5154941182401277122" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFIB0QnWw5cRx9WBzNhdbkNt5jTEjoQchqkDS4__FXONKoOwE2BVzNk-pP4BtT348vnvw7udFiBUetWodoy8ra9tzNFRoWk56_xO9LQBgiLyxU3OQBWrI7i2pRnoYXl8Z0P91_ALfTwDm3/s320/eye01.jpg" border="0" /> <p align="center"><em>Eye candy</em></p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-30760528044675416812008-01-09T18:25:00.000+00:002008-01-09T18:27:51.067+00:00I want to make this quote a mixtape<em><strong>"There is homophobia in every corner and pocket of this world, but at the core ... you just love someone and want to make mixtapes for them" -Sara Quin <blockquote></blockquote></strong></em>Just yet another reason why the Quin twins are awesome.Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-20747547232314405072008-01-08T19:17:00.000+00:002008-11-13T18:40:34.084+00:00Oh, I'm ready: Bring 2008 ON!<div align="justify">It's 2008, which feels unreal. I feel like the big millenium thing just happened last year and that makes me feel old. Even though I'm not at all (early 20's still!). </div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">But just as with the mark of any new year, people feel the need to improve themselves, to make a fresh start, and to reinvent different areas of their lives right about now. And I am no exception. I tend to think that new year's resolutions are silly and that making them around december 31st doesn't really make them any more likely to stick than if you were to make a resolution on a wednesday afternoon in april. But nevermind that, I still make new year's resolutions. </div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153195114986695858" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQzU5vI4xIC-UQuSXLVwdOCB3F-j0ruCbyKsF8VWgxXy_dhfb3sVv_9etkKb5IYmKNOI7caIVYruk21BoUF-ZZ-OgfXXxNw4rbXyo_A7yoelt9CzlXRJ-Lh28K4PAf-NuSwb2pUj3gXizP/s320/resolutions.jpg" border="0" /> <blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">For 2007 I made just one (that I can remember anyway...) and that was <strong>to not have sex</strong>. Now, you might be wondering "to NOT have sex? Is this woman out of her mind?". Well, possibly, but don't base that assumption on my new year's resolution before hearing my explanation for why a resolution not to have sex is the best new year's resolution ever. See, it's a win-win situation. There are two scenarios:</p><blockquote></blockquote><ol><li>I don't have sex all year. Well, that sucks... but at least I kept my new year's resolution! </li><li>I have sex. Damn it, I broke my new year's resolution... but who the fuck cares, I got laid! Woohoo!</li></ol><p align="justify">And <em>that</em> is why I am repeating this resolution for 2008. (Just for the record: I totally broke my 2007 resolution. I repeat: Woohoo!)</p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">I also have some boring but stimulating and environmentally friendly ones, such as <strong>reading more books</strong> and <strong>consuming less</strong>. But I won't go into detail about that.</p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">Instead I'll delve into the one that has to do with my dating life. I have decided to challenge myself to do something that I have thought about many times but never dared to actually do. Before the end of 2008 I will <strong>ask a stranger out</strong>. And I don't mean online or through a friend or something, I mean <strong>in person</strong>. It seems like one of those things that people always do in movies. They see that cute girl in the coffee shop, walk up to her and casually ask if she's single and if she'd like to go out some time. I wanna do that! I'd actually like to be just as forward and laidback about it as the guy in Office Space is when he walks up to Jennifer Anistons character in the restaurant she works in and asks her out to lunch. But then again, that guy was under serious hypnosis at the time and was doing some other pretty crazy stuff at the time, so maybe that's not a good idea to go that far... Regardless of how I do it, I've already got my eye on a very cute girl who works in a store I frequent. We shall see.</p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-12481677793284100872007-12-11T19:48:00.000+00:002008-11-13T18:40:34.314+00:00Vegans Are Sexy<div align="justify">Okay, I realize it might sound a bit conceited, since I myself am vegan. And I will admit there are probably quite a few exceptions. But all in all, there's just no way getting around it: Vegans are hot. <blockquote></blockquote>This weekend I visited a big vegan fair, which all in all had over 1500 visitors. A good portion of which were women who set off my gaydar. A small bit of it might have been <a href="http://www.afterellen.com/blog/dorothysnarker/wishful-lesbian-thinking-private-lives-of-pippa-lee">wishful lesbian thinking</a>, but most of it was definitely not. It is my experience that many queer women are vegan. Or many vegan women are queer. Not sure which is the hen and which is the egg in this case. Regardless: Vegans eat neither. And it does them good, because wow. I've rarely seen so many goodlooking women in one place. <blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5142822333136712962" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuzTw2UJeOsJ5zIBOoiRiVuYEge9ATPoTBBBo11Piq_kZ-fqSvRE93Wa8WK7DTeNgy0hxX1mCqO8SvWTV0HyVud0LYNTdLxtBxp49PotS2wcHssKItEYJLM_zKRoaZI8fT6aeU6FccGoiL/s320/notanugget-thumb.gif" border="0" /></div><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">I found myself exchaning glances with plenty of cute girls, and even engaging a few in conversation (well, it's easy when they're selling t-shirts and you're buying them...). But of course I could never conciously flirt with any of them. I only do it inadverdently and when The Ex points out that "hey, that girl was totally flirting with you" I get shy. As much as I would love to march on back to that vending table and ask the cute vegan out, I instead find myself muttering over my plate of tofu ham half an hour later "I wish I was Shane". Because let's face it: In a room full of gorgeous queer girls Shane would have definitely walked away with a pocket full of phone numbers. It think I feel a new year's resolution coming on...</p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-20918354377800802102007-12-02T14:50:00.000+00:002008-11-13T18:40:34.490+00:00The Sex Date<div align="justify">Finally I'm getting around to writing this entry. I've been stressed about work and now to top it all off I've got a terrible cold (again!), fever and all. But I've propped myself up at my computer to write this entry before the memories become too blurry. Not that I plan on writing out the details... Oh well, on with it already!
<blockquote></blockquote>So Miss Sex arrived Friday afternoon and came over to my place. I showed her around my apartment (a pretty quick tour, it's not like it's very big) and we ended up on the couch, chatting about music, movies, friends, family, love, sex... you name it, we pretty much talked about it. And this felt like good talking, I must say. Not like they "Oh gawd can you please shut up so we can have sex already?"talking, but rather "Wow, you're a cool person and we're really clicking on this level". Anyway, fortunately one thing did eventually lead to another as she pulled me in for a kiss and then that was that. Good sex ensued. And that was the first night. <blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139398479697622258" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKr0l8IYyMxHIV9ZHxZNLOR0i0wQlaWZrqHyrqLaqtNdDhNCPJFn_yB64HieacQoCCGapEjiOgrtXSLw8WkVKZ41izHYil69p9c16hbzRS1UcciA8WgoBcDmgFrKquKmPEALIFbL_pBteX/s320/fun.jpg" border="0" />Saturday we spent taking bubble baths and cooking and talking some more. In the late afternoon we met up with some of her friends (and some of mine) for drinks. When we got home later that evening some really freakin fantastic sex took place. Really. Some of the best sex of my life. So when I say the first night was good sex, I really mean that: It was GOOD sex. But the second night... Wow. She was awesome, I was awesome. It was then and there that we decided that we definitely need to hook up again at some point in the future. Next time, I'll visit her and we already have plans for what we'll be doing. Hehe.
<blockquote></blockquote>On Sunday she left pretty early to meet up with a friend before catching her train. Saying goodbye was for once in my life not traumatic at all. And that's something that I love about this whole situation: Miss Sex and I have a great connection, both friendshipwise and sexually. But it is not in any way a love connection. We want different things in some aspects (we want too much of the same in other) and we live many many miles apart. And I think knowing that what we have now is all that we are ever going to have is just so comforting to me. There's no wobbling back and forth, no "what do I feel?", "what do I want?". Just "Ah. Good stuff."
<blockquote></blockquote>I'm left with a newly awoken appreciation for sex, a boosted sexual confidence level, and the harmonic feeling of finally getting laid.</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-50215428263107271772007-11-28T21:52:00.000+00:002007-11-28T21:55:43.095+00:00A quick update<div align="justify">The sex date has come and gone but I've been too busy to blog about it (damn work and sleep, getting in the way of my blogging!) so I just wanted to drop in and let any interested parties know that it was very successful and that I'm exhausted but feeling very pleased... in more ways than one. The dry spell is officially over! Cheers!</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-76391341723351667782007-11-20T17:48:00.000+00:002008-11-13T18:40:34.821+00:00Ex Couples DinnerIt is a quite common thing for couples to invite other couples over for dinner once in a while. Well, this weekend I had myself a little ex couples dinner. It was me and The Ex, and then my two best friends who just broke up about a year ago but had before that been together for as long as I've known them. Let's call them Chip and Dale (because that's what they sound like when they talk over each other). The Ex, Chip, Dale and myself all had a lovely evening of vegan spinach and tofu pie and board games. Everyone spent the night, and we spent the last bit of the evening before going to sleep all cuddled up on my fold out sofa bed, relaxing and talking about random things. All in all, a great evening with lots of laughs. Why don't more people have ex couples dinners? Or maybe they do and I just don't know about it? One things for sure: This will be a recurring thing for <em>these </em>two ex couples.
<div><div align="justify"><blockquote></blockquote>The Ex is now officially hooked on "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila", after being recommended by me to check it out. Why would I tell her to watch such a horribly tragic show? Well, because it is the show that the word "trashtastic" was invented for. And The Ex and I both love us some trashtasticness. I mean: Yes, "A Shot at Love" is offensive at times. It promotes plenty of stereotypes about men, women, bisexuals, straight guys, lesbians... and so on. But it's also really frickin hilarious and cringe worthily exciting. The cat fights, the stupid comments, the insanely ridiculous challenges... It's all just so bad that it's good. <blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5134999111876254386" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfWV6kar2TzXSjqf9JdT_evFn8vi-CPprHCt21pADB-raBHXxYS-Dxeh_Yal5pbc4zG_tAS_SH4-NtFWhqLEk9L0jQ-t6ftdiAcS7YQqoFVEAM_GLLXASnj0EjXpNpol068qGbj38vUOTy/s320/fb_07.jpg" border="0" /></div></div>
<blockquote></blockquote><p align="center"><em>In "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila" psychotic violence and crying fits are gender blind.</p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="center"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5134999253610175170" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKueLxMgo26_fd4lRLM_FvaoaBmP3VGSF2rv3wyv85I4nK7HnHhYM7oioNv8KHDzAWIP2AajAPMhOQhx3Gb95iC0OONsMlw2EpyNVWs2OliX50G_vXKsthY26kkGUDSbDzX0mvFsUja3nb/s320/tila_vanessa_10.jpg" border="0" /></em></p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-66745859973852378102007-11-17T21:29:00.000+00:002007-11-17T21:34:21.134+00:00The Lesbionic WomanI haven't even seen The Bionic Woman, but this is just too awesome:
<embed src="http://www.veoh.com/videodetails2.swf?player=videodetailsembedded&type=v&permalinkId=v14435797SWaqrD5&id=anonymous" allowFullScreen="true" width="540" height="438" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer"></embed><br/><a href="http://www.veoh.com/">Online Videos by Veoh.com</a>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-79567065947897242852007-11-11T11:19:00.001+00:002008-11-13T18:40:35.057+00:00Let's Talk About Sex, Baby<div align="justify">Less than two weeks to go before my sex date is standing in my hallway and... well, we'll see where it goes from there. I'm excited and nervous and feeling a little bit of performace anxiety. It's been a good long while since I've had sex. And regardless of my long dry spell, I'm always nervous before the first time with a new woman. I must say, I never encountered these issues back in the day when I was sleeeping with men. It might in part have to do with the fact that I was younger then, but I believe it has a great deal to do with gender roles and sexuality. With men it wasn't all that difficult to be good in bed. I was confident, aggressive, and wild and I rarely, if ever, felt that I was lacking. With women, it's a whole different bussiness. All women are so very different in what they like, what they don't like, what pleases and what doesn't. I realize that men are different as well, but I suppose I've found that with men it's more in the details the preferences differ while with women there can be very specific and basic dos and don'ts. Why that's the case? </div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">*DISCLAIMER: I will now go into a rant about sexuality, gender, and socializing. Be warned!* </div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">Well, I'm of that queer school of thinking where I believe gender differences are socially constructed, and while I won't bore you to tears with a tirade on the role of sexuality in the hierarchy of societal structure, I do believe that men and women are taught to have very separate takes on sexuality. </div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5131551676912314850" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1Dm523uIauHshtbLe8nCjZ6Tv8xVYobWri_4R4lmZww19EwKKyhB1FYizGYeBy8P10VMbgdld2g_wmlkmdKR5kaHMCSRFJ7B_0MD7c6r2wZcweB34vcglPujBKrlnTPSf0q0pIg-DK33_/s320/slut-man.jpg" border="0" /> <div align="justify"><blockquote></blockquote>The heterosexual paradigm rules that men and women are supposed to be complimentary, that's part of it. And I realize that's where many of my thoughts stem from. With men there's an assumtion that they always want sex and that all sex is good for them, while women will agree to put out every once in a while in exchange for love and safety. Complete bullshit, of course, and most of us know that, rationally speaking. But it's one of those socially embedded norms that lurks beneath the surface and can influence even the most enlightened feminist. I sure as hell know I've been a victim of it! Like I was saying: Back in the day when I was still sleeping with men I could spot a guy, decide I wanted to sleep with him, and proceed to make it happen. With women I shyly stand around waiting for the girl I have my eye on to make her move, not wanting to come off as aggressive or make her uncomfortable. I've discussed this with many of my bisexual friends, whom also confess to having a complete double standard when it comes to picking up men and picking up women. Has our femininst awareness that's made us so good at claiming what we want when it comes to men backfired in the sapphic cruising department? Or have the many years we've spent as victims (in various, individual ways) as women in a male dominated world taken it's toll so that we are terrified in same-sex settings of taking on the male "villain" role? Loosly formed thoughts, but it's been on my mind, what can I say... <blockquote></blockquote>*Rant over* <blockquote></blockquote>Okay, back to what I started writing about: My sex date. Basically I'm excited, but scared. I'm thrilled we both know what's going to happen and that we'll hopefully avoid the akward "who'll make the first move" dance. I've heard through the grapevine that the woman in question, let's call her Miss Sex, is very excited about coming to visit and has been talking up a storm about it (yes, we are already connected on <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_L_Word#The_Chart">the chart</a>... thus gossip ensues). I'm feeling the pressure, especially what with her being quite experienced and all my sexual experience with women being confined to girl-on-girl virgins. I've always said I really wanted to have sex with an experienced woman though, and here I am, getting what I've asked for. Sweet!</div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-72558236411206125242007-11-05T19:38:00.000+00:002008-11-13T18:40:35.128+00:00Report from Celibate Land<div align="justify">I went away for a while. Not so much physically - I've still been lounging around my apartment, as usual - but as far as the blogging goes. I suppose making a pledge to be celibate for life makes for really boring blogging material, and so I wasn't very inspired to write. And my gawd, my life sure has been boring these past few months. I've basically worked lots and spent a whole lot of quality time with my dog. Well, that's not completely true. I've managed to fit in a few weekend excursions to visit dear friends I don't get to see very often. I've spent fun times with the friends I do get to see quite often. I spent part of these past months struggling with a bad cold that later turned into an eye infection and sinusitis, and in the process I watched a whole lot of movies and good tv-shows (yeah, not very exciting, I know). </div><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5129448594643608578" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfZuM2kwfXOfTg4Sawg9aQkkjCLk3d_JA2Pa_fuoKVIzmcM6-_ya8Ywq76bAxddv3bHyx3SWQ7uZVG5OO7-zoin-Cx6SnNZAqgBbvReRch6aDCSv3P8XkYAQ4BEMarBv-i5gNUMjSPxn1b/s320/Lone%252520Palm,%252520Sahara%252520Desert.jpg" border="0" /></p><p align="center"><em>Welcome to Celibate Land!</p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify"></em>Regardless of how the past few months have been, I'm now inspired to write again because things are a-stirring. </p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">First things first: I have a sex date. Yes, it's true. A woman I've only met once before will traveling down to my end of the country for a weekend of meaningless sex. And that is for sure: This will be sex and nothing else. It might be meaningful in the sense that I'll be getting laid for the first time in forever, but that's all the meaning it will hold. And I couldn't be more thrilled! </p><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">Secondly: A friend of mine just called me and wants to set me up on a blind date with a girl she claims is beautiful and on the look-out for a good woman. She pleaded me to agree to go out with this girl, something that really wasn't necessary considering how bored I've been with myself and my love life lately. But she probably did so based on our previous experiences with her matchmaking efforts (hint: they haven't worked out too good).</div><blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">What can I say? I'm getting excited about my life for the first time in quite a while! And that may sound slightly tragic, like I'm this single just walking around feeling worthless... but that couldn't be further from the truth! I just happen to think that I'm quite a catch and that I shouldn't be thrown out of the "people-with-a-healthy-sex-life"-group quite yet... </div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-3676994668539911502007-08-27T17:32:00.000+01:002007-08-27T17:50:34.046+01:00Nothing much going on<div align="justify">Not much lesbian news in my life at the moment. I'm listening obsessively to Tegan and Sara's new album, "The Con" (so good!) and watching South of Nowhere online (also so good!) and that's pretty much it. It may have something to do with my social life being limited to work and my dog right now, due to circumstances out of my control, that all things gay are coming to me only through music and television rather than through real life experiences... <blockquote></blockquote>However, there's always one thing or another to tell. Such as the slight mental breakdown I had this weekend after spending an entire day with older relatives. Basically, I attended a luncheon to celebrate my grandfather's 85th birthday and almost suffocated on the celebration of heterosexuality that was going on. Everyone was so incredibly narrowminded and heteronormative and I think it reacted with my PMS in an unfortunate way because I cried my way home in the backseat of my parents' car. <blockquote></blockquote>Exaggerated reaction? Possibly. <blockquote></blockquote>I'm just so incredibly used to being open with my sexuality in all settings but with my grandfather, I've never really gotten the chance to come out. I don't see him all that often and I guess I just don't know how to tell him. So basically every time I see him or other old old relatives, there come the questions: "So, do you have a boyfriend yet?" To which I reply honestly that "No, that's not really my thing". The only problem is: They don't get it. <blockquote></blockquote>I was trying to explain to my parents why this is so upsetting to me. That I have never ever had issues with my sexuality (coming out was relatively painless for me, even though my mother took it horribly) but that the generational gap somehow makes it so very hard for me and that I feel made to be ashamed by those relatives that go on and on about their grandchildren that are getting married to such nice young men, blablabla. Well, my parents were so comforting and sweet about it, telling me that it's just another generation and they don't understand it. <blockquote></blockquote>Thing is though: I know my parents would never walk in a Pride parade, under the PFLAG banner. I know that regardless of how much they love me and are proud of me in other aspects of my life, they'll never be particularly proud of the fact that I am openly gay. And that hurts, because to me that means that they don't love ALL of me, and they're not proud of ALL of me. They speak so proudly and easily of my sister and her boyfriend, something they would never do of me and a girlfriend. I know it and they know it, even though they might not admit it. </div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-33351938479484657212007-08-24T13:28:00.000+01:002008-11-13T18:40:35.567+00:00"If I gave you my number..."<div align="justify">I have a confession to make: I'm in love with Tegan Quin. Yes, her sister is cute too. But Tegan... mmm, Tegan.
</div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5102258345050506578" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_cp3ibne5TZCxX7ui_A22_-rJOJooHi9342b4nC8ltsaLOsTB-H6wtiqUVlZXC6kxZUmPBRpRlKz_AvdVJL5B5aRKA8zvrYpZNZ382VWaQ6OkxbeFwPTqeGGrHuEaXFJ4lc6S0bixBow8/s320/tegan.jpg" border="0" /> <p align="justify">Yes, I realize that I'm creepy. But I saw Tegan and Sara perform on Wednesday and I was completely and totally mesmerized. The hotness! The talent! The cuteness! The funny! The tattoos! Oh goddess, the tattoos... I could dedicate a full blog entry to the beauty that is inked body art. Basically: Tegan Quin is awesome, her sister is fabulous, and together they form the awesome-fabulous-fantastic Tegan and Sara. </p><blockquote></blockquote><div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5102259320008082786" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhU66lMCbXoAKE1LtHQimMBpElKJ95XtYwN8GrBdlTa3MYFhggwTk9AWGFLRCSvrRa2wsPF91fcjBHU3Oti5S3Akq3X94p6t5Uoz3WL8img8Dpaz8biXfS6yu2guJu2Oh-S83_9YDiJJSAB/s320/tegan+and+sara+2.jpg" border="0" />
<blockquote></blockquote><div align="justify">As the fan(atic) I am, I dragged The Ex and Good Guy along with me to sit and wait by the stage for an hour and a half before the show started. Unfortunately there were already tons of people, more fanatic than us, in the best spots, so we ended up being a little bit off to the side and in the second row pretty much. I swear 99% of the people standing in the very front were baby dykes. And they were incredibly cute and all, kissing each other and holding hands, but not so cute when they were elbowing me and having their friends push us out of the way to join them in the front. We elbow back goddamn it! <blockquote></blockquote>One of the cutest moments of the show must have been when Sara talked about what an attractive city Malmö is. Paraphrased: <blockquote></blockquote><blockquote>"You are a very attractive city. Like, were we come from, in Canada, there are
attractive people. But, there's like no ugly people in your city. It's sort of
really unsettling, and um... we also felt really short. Because we're... [Tegan
chimes in: "Short."] Yeah, we're short. And everyone here is like a hundred feet
taller than us. Its... You're creepy sort of. But awesome! Totally awesome.
Okay, so umm... Yeah." </blockquote><blockquote></blockquote>And then they played a song and after that Sara appologized for calling us creepy, but of course everyone was just thrilled to be called anything by Sara so she mostly got applause all the way through. Woohoo, Sara thinks I'm hot. And Tegan agrees, she was nodding. Yup, the world revolves around me and I took it as a personal compliment. </div></div>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-21562069264714674912007-08-18T20:45:00.000+01:002008-11-13T18:40:35.797+00:00"You give gay people a bad name"<div align="justify">My past few days have been spent at Malmöfestivalen, a week-long, free festival arranged by the city of Malmö. Yesterday I saw one of my new favorite singer-song writers, <a href="http://www.myspace.com/ashaalimusic">Asha Ali</a>, perform her beautiful music. I highly recommend you check her out!</div><blockquote></blockquote><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5100138649840911650" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEir_IHh88nd1oL27ppWo-d-4Uul-V13ecH2hMZ2Uh8H56rmvARtiUDsVb72YeFRV2iGAXrTRAfVQtj4Ra1gXWUmsl2cKv3kL4an4WcBgv1aC1n00eiksz25HYHnp5p9IFL0z68ENPEcbJZq/s320/asha+ali" border="0" /> <blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">Tonight was a gayer, as a I saw a one-woman show called "You give gay people a bad name", by and with Helena Sandström. It was a fabulous hour long comedic monolog, with a few interruptions by her male heterosexual sidekick. I watched, I laughed, I identified. The show was all about psychotic lesbians, trying to pick up chicks, and crying yourself to sleep because you still haven't gotten laid. And there was singing and dancing as well. So basically, it summed up my life nicely. I involuntarily ended up in the show when Helena was going to demonstrate how good she is at picking up women on a member of the audience. Of course it worked (even though her pick-up technique only consisted of walking by and ignoring me), I would have totally gone home with her. </p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5100136858839549202" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgURysmKAxCUF3pCUb0mAoLuJkHGQvtnRUOqkb4Ej1Y8gDKwCwjYu2M4Qjxvt9ZDhD3_4yXK-d_hRZQ9iJbwbLUSz76qULicQZiAgQUi1u0PFciVYi5PKUuOvtqNwDoLjrf14KSZULl6czo/s320/helena+sandtr%C3%B6m+2.jpg" border="0" /> </p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">Unfortunately she had a show to finish. Before picking me out of the crowd she had just finished telling a story about boiling an ex-girlfriend's hamster and calling her every night for three weeks to prove her love. So clearly, she was playing somebody psychotic and we all know how the psychos are attracted to me. All in all, it was very "Killing me softly" moment. (You know: <em>"Strumming my pain with his fingers, Singing my life with his words..." </em>and so on.) </p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">I loved the part where she explained to the straight people in the audience that there isn't one who is "the man" and one who is "the woman" in a lesbian relationship - there's one who's tall and one who's short. And that is how you divide the housework: The tall one changes the light bulbs, the short one fixes the car (since they can fit under the hood). And the garbage? You take turns, as long as both are tall enough to reach the trash can. Hah.</p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4742529956883692987.post-25631473223107409092007-08-11T22:54:00.000+01:002008-11-13T18:40:36.033+00:00Think I’m gonna cry, I don’t know why…<div align="justify">Post-Pride depression has now hit me full force, and it’s brought its friends, Post-Vacation depression and Summer-Is-Ending depression. I’m going back to work on Monday and right now I’m not loving my job. I know that it’s only that I’ve been away from it for a couple of weeks that’s causing this feeling of impending doom since I normally love my job and feel fortunate to be working with something I feel passionately about, but… right now I just want to cry whenever I think of the misery that is 10 months until next summer. It’s getting darker, the days are shorter, I’ll be working non-stop and my personal life will be boring and more or less non-existent as it normally is. <blockquote></blockquote>Oh, I’m such a pessimist. <blockquote></blockquote>Regardless: I promised a run down of the high- and lowlights of Pride, and here they are: <blockquote></blockquote><strong><em>The Parties:</em></strong> Wednesday was a slow night, we just hung out in Pride Park and had a few beers (we did watch Betty though and regardless of what you might think of the L Word theme song, they were good fun to see live, those crazy women). Thursday night was the big annual women’s party, 1500 girls on five dance floors. It was a fabulous time as always though the amount of incredibly beautiful women made all of our heads spin until we couldn’t focus on any one in particular. Friday night we went to a women’s dominated gay bar and danced ourselves sweaty. And Saturday night every one was exhausted and only two of us made it out to the queer party we’d already bought tickets for. The two of us had a great time though, dancing the night away, running into friends and acquaintances (among others The Acquaintance and “Straight” Girl) and enjoying our last night of Pride. <blockquote></blockquote><strong><em>The Friends:</em></strong> Seeing old ones, making new ones, and establishing deeper connections with those you previously knew only superficially is always fantastic. And it happens a lot, and very intensely, at Pride for me. And introducing Pride to newbies is always an amazing experience, and this year we had lots of newbies along for the ride, among others The Ex. <blockquote></blockquote><strong><em>The Speeches and Seminars:</em></strong> One speech in particular comes to mind for me. Tiina Rosenberg, a queer feminist icon in my eyes, rousing up the crowd in the book tent in Pride Park, reaching an almost religious feeling as she cursed the patriarchy and encouraged all dykes to be ugly, fat, and aggressive. And to continue drinking our herbal tea. She was funny and energetic and amazing. Also, the panel discussion in Pride House on morals as a social construction was interesting and set off discussions within my group of friends. <blockquote></blockquote><em><strong>The Shopping:</strong></em> LGBT literature, I love it. And I can’t find it as easily accessible anywhere but in Pride Park. I must’ve bought five books and less than a week later all but one have been read. And then there’s all the cute little stuff, the magnets and post cards and t-shirts and pins that you just can’t not buy. You gotta have those Pride souvenirs I suppose, at least one or two. <blockquote></blockquote><em><strong>The Parade:</strong></em> We had a theme and it was kind of sexy. I had on a pretty slutty outfit to start out. Then I got warm (and a little drunk) and decided to take off the more covering parts of the outfit. So basically I marched through all of Stockholm, proudly waving to the half a million people that were watching the parade, in high heels and underwear. Let’s leave it at that. <blockquote></blockquote></div><p><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5097566493140770450" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0zDLXpGuiuo8dhZ2hsmJvHyPb7N3FMwLP_8qsscxwFKxJ2_sL1BIMr_Ni6EFzDEbtxWDKIOG5R1cSUq0KEjpeaTPLiRbkPayS3hjrCKSVwdJmR_MTIiVfVc0H1BMtGg93zmcEFJo4mPKW/s320/Pride6.jpg" border="0" /></p><p align="center"><em>I won't bore you with pictures of me in my undies, but here is a wonderful fellow parader who pointed out that we were wearing the same shoes.</p><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote></em><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify"><strong><em>Making Out and Flirting:</em></strong> There was mucho flirting. There was mucho making out (particularly in the parade, I left a lot of smudged lipstick on a lot of girls). I must say, I was pretty forward all of Pride. Perhaps not so much with the initiating of make out sessions, but at least with starting up conversations with pretty strangers. Go me! </p><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify"><em><strong>Not Getting Laid, Not Even A Little:</strong></em> Clearly a lowlight as it means I will go into absolute celibacy and never get laid again. I’m seriously giving up. Or as Pink would say: It’s just me and my hand tonight (and for every night from now on). Pessimist, me? What? I will however not be turning down pretty ladies that want to get in my pants (wherever those women are hiding), I’m just not going to be chasing after them. I am so done with the chasing. </p><blockquote></blockquote><p align="justify">And there it is: My Pride 2007, summed up as neatly as I could.</p>Anonymous Lesbianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18395785246157941418noreply@blogger.com6